embracing the whole ☯️

defining myself for myself.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve struggled with how people perceive me. “Taylor, you’re so ________ (sweet, angelic, innocent, quiet, fill in the blank.).” I absorbed these labels, and over time, they made me feel fearful and ashamed of expressing their opposites—my wildness, loudness, boldness, or even the parts of me others might label as “bad.” I felt like I had to shapeshift into the version of me that others expected, suppressing the fullness of who I truly am. The older I get, the more I realize how much I defined myself by others’ perceptions rather than defining myself for myself.

This realization led me to illuminate my shadow — the parts of myself I felt I had to hide because they didn’t match the version of me the world seemed to want. But it’s not up to the world to decide what is worth witnessing about me. I’ve been working on freeing myself from the little inner judge that insists I conceal not only my imperfections or faults but also the sides of me tied to shame, whether it’s my sensuality, pleasure, or vices. Shadow work has taught me that we have to bring the dark to light. True wholeness comes from integration, from embracing both the light and the dark, yin and yang, moon and sun.

Self-portraits have been a powerful tool in this process. I recently stumbled across the ones featured that I captured a couple of years ago, and they speak so profoundly to me now. They represent the self I get to study, build, and create in my own time. That’s what I love about self-portraits – in that sweet solitude, I get to decide who I am, how I show up, and how I see myself. No one else. It’s a practice that ensures my own voice is louder than the ones outside, allowing me to define myself clearly and authentically.

I’ve always been a multidimensional person. I move through life on a spectrum of extremes, my astrology is mostly all fire and water, with little in between. And while I might not show every side of me to the world, it’s because I don’t owe that to anyone. But in embracing my extremes, I’ve also found beauty in seeking balance. There’s something powerful about walking the middle path between fire and water, light and dark. It’s not about erasing my extremes but harmonizing them, finding strength and peace in their coexistence.

What if we led our lives through our own lens, guided by our self-concept rather than the ones imposed on us? What if we allowed ourselves the freedom to embrace every facet of who we are—the light, the shadow, the extremes—and find balance within that?

If self-portraits intrigue you, let me know – I’ll share tips and guides on how to explore this practice. It’s something I’m deeply passionate about and believe can be transformative for anyone seeking to define themselves on their own terms.

With love,

Taylor